Really I'm not a Loser!

So we all know that some people lose things more than others. I feel I have a somewhat undeserved reputation. I rarely lose something permanently, I just temporarily misplace items. I can't even tell you how many times Will has said, "If you always put something in the same place, you'll know where to find it." In spite of that annoying and repetitive advice, my keys just don't  always make it to the peg where they are supposed to hang. They end up on top of the fridge, or in my purse, or on my dresser, or in the pocket of the last jacket or pants I wore. The peg is not always in front of me when I need to get the keys out of my hand.

The week before last, I separated my car key from my work/house keys so that a friend could borrow my car. I thought I might as well keep them separate. Friday when I got to work, I remembered why I keep them together. My work keys were still at my desk, and I couldn't get in to the building. I called the custodian, but I only had his home number, not his cell.  The Officemax delivery gal came and I signed for my packages outside the locked door. Fortunately, when I got to looking through classroom windows, I found a custodian and was able to get in. It was a lovely day, and it only took me about 10 minutes to get in, but I learned my lesson and decided I needed to hook those keys back together. But I didn't get around to it that day.

On Monday morning, I got to work and once again realized I didn't have my work key ring. Really, did I leave them at my desk again? My co-worker was there and let me in when I banged on the door. Although I checked all my drawers, looked in all the rooms in the office, under my car seats, and my trunk, no keys were found. I searched my house and my gym bag when I came home. No luck. Mystifying. I seemed to recall using the house key on Saturday night, so they must be at home. What would I do? It's kind of serious to lose the keys to a school. To put it mildly. I have worked there for 13 years and never lost them. Really, it's not like I'm some key loser.

(Okay, I did permanently lose one set of keys in my life, the most expensive one I could lose. It just happened to be the electronic key for the Dodge Durango that we bought way back in what, about 1998? And I lost it shortly after we got it and was stuck using the stupid manual key for the rest of the time we had it.  And back in 1998, I was still a mere child, barely 40. I've matured and become so much more responsible since then.)

So I was fretting about my missing keyring last night, and Will smugly said another one of his favorite phrases, "Well, you know it's wherever you left it. That's where you'll find it." So infuriating. Not helpful. I believe I responded with a cold fake smile. Not easy when it's 95 degrees out there. I tossed couch cushions, but found nothing but popcorn. I searched the house again, but no luck.

This morning I awoke a little after 5, and by the time my phone alarm went off at 6, I was nearly finished with a beautiful sunrise run. I was in a great mood and hungry for a little oatmeal for breakfast, but I opened the cupboard and remembered I had none. (No, it wasn't lost, I clearly remembered emptying the container.) I was hoping I had left some in the trailer last time we camped, so I went to where Will keeps the trailer keys, stretched as far as I could to reach a set, when what to my wondering eyes should appear......Wait, let me just go grab my keys off the countertop so I can take a picture instead of trying to describe this.

Will is a man of many talents, and a few winters ago, he was really into making these awesome little key fobs. If you were at our house, you were likely to walk away with one of these in varying sizes. I didn't ask for this, I kind of prefer to have a key ring that doesn't make a huge pocket bulge, but he graciously gave me this small version. You never know if you might get lost in the woods and need a length of rope. If you do, you can unravel this and do all kinds of useful things with it. Yay. Needless to say, all the key rings in this house have these handy things attached to them. Including the keys for the trailer.

So, as I stretched with all my might to reach the trailer keys, I see my gym card, which you can see above, attached to one of these key rings. None of the other trailer rings has a white card like this. My key ring was underneath the two trailer key rings. Oh, the joy. I danced out to the trailer. Shucks, there was no oatmeal there but who needs oatmeal when you've just escaped a possible prison sentence for losing your school keys. Just then Will returned from his morning walk with the dog and I exclaimed that I had found the keys, and indeed, they definitely were NOT where I had left them! I led him to the location of discovery, and he knew exactly what happened.

Just  before my keys disappeared, I had gone out to the trailer. He noticed the keys hanging on my peg, and thought that I had left the trailer keys in the wrong place. He did not chide me, but graciously took them and hung them where trailer keys belong. He was pleased to note that a long missing third set of keys had apparently returned. In the meantime, he did some reorganizing and put the keys in a little different place, so the top keys ended up on the bottom.

Did you get that? I put the keys on the peg, exactly where they belonged, and they got LOST!! This just goes to show once again, that I am not exaggerating or making lame excuses when I declare that when things go wrong here, it is almost never my fault. It is either Will's fault or a technological/mechanical malfunction. And he fully agrees with me now. It is a wonderful life. I just wish technological malfunctions didn't happen so often. While writing this, I had a song playing twice on the computer, and one had started about 30 seconds after the other one. I am ashamed to admit how long it took me to figure out how to get the last one found and stopped. But I did it all by myself

I really do not deserve my patient, long suffering husband. But I am very thankful for him!

And yes, my car key is now with my work keys so I can't drive to work without them.