Weird Dreams

Monday evening around 9 PM as we returned from a successful softball game, we noticed the Sheriff's Office traffic car parked near the intersection where we turn off the highway to come home. Will was making an approving comment about them working traffic here, when it lit up and followed me around the corner. I realized my lights weren't on and turned them on as I was pulling over. He directed me to go to the next intersection, so I ended up in front of the neighbor's house, three houses down from my own.

So the young deputy approached my car, asked for my driver's license, registration, and insurance. I asked Will to get the things from the glove box and I gave him my license. The deputy looked at it, then bent over and peered into the car, seeing that the passenger was indeed the Undersheriff, and he had just pulled over Mrs. Undersheriff. Do you suppose a deputy would view such an event as a stroke of good fortune or a horrible, no good, very bad day? "Good evening Sir. How are you Sir," he said. "Sir" was chuckling as he pulled everything out of the glove box and dumped it on my lap instead of actually just finding the needed documents.

I found the documents and handed them over. He mentioned noticing that I had turned on my lights and asked why I was driving without them. I explained that I always left them on Auto, but we had stopped at Home Depot. I waited in the car and turned the lights off so no one would come and point out they were on during the minute it takes them to go off, then I forgot to turn them back on. He gave me a short lecture about using my lights and let me know how concerned he was that I get safely home. Then he leaned over to see Will and said, "Have a good evening Sir." I believe the "Sir" word was used several more times but I can't remember what he said. No wonder Will has occasionally been heard to mutter under his breath that he doesn't get treated with enough respect at home.

So anyway, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling very upset. I dreamed that this deputy came back to the house a little later and told me that I needed to take a breathalyzer test. I said no problem, I don't drink at all. To my amazement, the results read .15. The deputy was very unhappy, not wanting to arrest me but knowing I couldn't get by with such a crime. He asked me what I had been drinking, which made me realize I could not remember what I had been doing the past few hours. I knew I had gone out for pizza but I didn't know where or with who, or what I had eaten or drank. So had I actually been drinking? Why would I do such a thing? I had no idea. I was so confused. Fortunately I woke up just then, and as consciousness returned, my confusion dissipated and I realized how ridiculous it was. Obviously they can't get you for driving drunk if they come to your house later on! And obviously I hadn't been drinking, I had been playing softball!

Then last night I woke again in the middle of the night, very glad indeed to be home in my own bed. I had dreamed that I was visiting someone and they had a pet lion in the house, an enormous creature who followed it's owner everywhere he went. I have no idea who these people were or why I was at their house, but I was very uncomfortable about sharing a house with a lion.

I must need a vacation or something! Metolius, here I come!